A Couple of Strokes

Shay and best freind Chachoi had always told me to look more on the postive things that are happening with me. These two people are actually the people I get to talk to in times of troubles.

I think they are right, there are just so many things to celebrate. Bessy told me the passe' words of advise that I need to count my blessings so I would realized how much blessed I am. True enough...there are just so many things I need to thank for instead of and despite of. I had been given of small portion of the things I need and still manage to survive, it might be less of what i set as ideal, but I managed to live on. While shay made me realized that dwelling on the positive side of life is the best defense I could impose to all my worries.

These are the things I know for so long...And so most of us do. But it just makes so much impact when it comes from people who had been there and uses the same formula over and over again as storms hits them every now and then : )

No matter how strong you think you are. There comes a point wherein you just suddenly feels that everything you are going through is so much. For the longest time, I had tried to play with my emotions. I had succeeded in fooling myself. I had pretended that I was not happy when I should just to protect my interest. I had shown great smile when no one knows i'm all bleeding inside. I had tried to modify and moderate my passions and limited my access to the world outside because other things deserve my attention. I had been the teacher to myself on how to deal with life's complexities.

I'm getting tired, there's just too much of so much. but i don't want to admit that I am getting there. Probably because I don't want to set my mind on something like that and I would want to continue to do what I am doing because this is all I want during my formative years. I made a promised to myself to do it, not for anything else and just for the sake of doing it. And as long as I live, I will continue to dream of the same wavelenght and focus.

And as they say... you can complain, rest if you must but don't you ever quit.

The Beginning

Now, at last I will start to write online. I had been accustomed writing in my journal in an "on and off " manner. There, I get to explode, expose and tell God all my thoughts regarding my pain, happiness, thankfullness, regrets, accomplishments and my defeats.

I will now venture into exposing my emotions into this virtual memory storage wherein I do not have any defense to cover my thoughts, perhaps it is something I want to do for the longest time.